language n. A means for miscommunication.
lawyer n. A social parasite trained to understand the obfuscatory language in which other lawyers, in order to further the need for their kind, have couched the laws of the land.
| Any time you get any amount of lawyers involved, the good will sort of fizzles. | |
| --Patrick K. McGowan, interview, 1987 | |
| The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers. | |
| --William Shakespeare, Henry VI, Part II | |
liberal n. A species of politician who advocates massive spending for social programs, that support being based on the fact that it is likely to get him re-elected. Popular with persons who believe that there is such a thing as a free lunch.
| He has the luck to be unhampered by either character, or conviction, or social position; so that Liberalism is the easiest thing in the world for him. | |
| --Henryk Ibsen, The League of Youth | |
lottery n. The numbers racket, cloaked in respectability but no less ruinous to the purses of those cannot resist it any more than they can afford it. Practiced by grifters masquerading as public officials. See also liberal.
love n. Once the noblest of emotions, described as being patient, blind, and that which distinguishes man from beast. Generally used at present as a euphemism for lust.
| What did your body say to mine deep in velvet night's delight? |
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| --William Rose Benet, The Dust Which Is God | |
lunch n. Formerly, a meal taken at noontime. Presently, an exercise in (variously) corporate powermongering, seduction, financial manipulation, or the conspicuous consumption of designer water.
| The History of every major Galactic Civilisation tends to pass through three distinct and recognisable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry, and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why, and Where. For instance, the first phase is characterised by the question, "How can we eat?", the second by the question, "Why do we eat?", and the third by the question, "Where shall we have lunch?" | |
| --Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy | |